and what else? do i miss him? really him? or just comfortability? dealing with c's problems or helping or whatever it is i do is making me feel ilek i made the right choice, or handled it well i guess is a better description, however, is making me wish i had something still. and i hate that he doesnt have time to even want to write back to me, busy as always. because i do think about him and want him around, i think. even i if i can rationalize circles around why its better to know why i "really" think i need him, even as a friend, it just doesnt make me feel any better.